My Cowering Soul
Well friends, I seem to have settled into a deep and odious funk.
And I'm not just referring to the serious lack of hair-washing that's been going on around here. The rats have been really nice to me lately--I think they are finally beginning to see me as a kindred spirit. Another smelly, depressed prisoner.
I really think that there is something wrong with me. My brain is malfunctioning. It's like when windows gets its panties in a wad about some operation or other, and you tell it to quit but it can't, you know? No matter how much it wants to, it just can't stop.
Anyway, what are everybody's suggestions for dinner on Friday? Since Casa Vieja is out. Something not too expensive, and extremely tasty. Someplace that doesn't serve hamburgers. What say you?
17 comments:
So I think I shall return the favor of the JackIntheBox from Tuesday by devoting myself to un-funking you.
I don't have a strategy just yet, but I should be able to come up with one by tomorrow. Speaking of which, are you still cool with me dropping by tomorrow to buy the plane ticket? Cause if you're feeling too funked-up for company, I can wait till Saturday or Sunday.
Oh, hey! I also get paid tomorrow. So if you want, I could pick up a pizza for you on my way from work. Or fix you something. You know how much I love to use your oven instead of mine.
For what it's worth, I had a great time hanging out with you this week. Nobody does a better job of keeping me un-funked than you. And I think your hair looks great, and it certainly didn't smell unwashed to me.
Do you think this has to do with the anatomy thing? Or the dog thing? Or those bastard MotherStuffers? Have you talked to William about it? What does he say?
--Your dear Brother, and fellow ass-jiggler.
Hey, and seriously? I suck so much harder than you do. And I'm not in a bad mood, so you should cheer up, as well. You're at least working toward something, you know? Even if you're afraid you won't acheive your goals (which I'm pretty sure you will), at least you have them. And you have a soul mate to share shit with. (Yeah, sorry. I didn't want to have to use that phrase, either. But it's true.) You have a soul mate who's passionately commited to you, because he's entranced by the awesomeness that is you.
--Andrew
And God knows you have a whole host of people hovering breathlessly around their computers, waiting for you to update your blog. Which you should do more often.
--Andrew
Do you want to go to the art museum this weekend? If nothing else, you'll be comforted in the knowledge that you're much cooler than the crappy Oregon Artists.
--Andrew
Alright. So this is my strategy, I think. I'm just going to keep leaving you comments until you feel better.
Not the best strategy in the world, mind you, but at least it's doable while I sit here on my ass at work, with absolutely nothing to do.
--Andrew
Is this one of those "I'm unemployed; I'm worthless" funks? Because God, do I know those.
I'm going to sit down with my boss this afternoon and make him look up your resume. I know this isn't the job you'd chose for yourself, but it's all I have to offer. At least it's something.
--Andrew
Hey...so would it make you feel any better if we skipped out on Thanksgiving and motored on up to Seattle? Because I'm totally cool with that, if it's what it takes to make you feel better.
I'll even cover gas and the hotel.
--Andrew
Ok, honestly, Emily. You know what I've done with my day today? Stuffed envelopes. And...that's it.
--Andrew
Feeling better yet? Or do I have to innundate this sucker with more comments? Cause I'm here till three thirty, and I'm more than prepared to keep going at it until then. Longer, even. Such is my determination. You shall be un-funked, by God.
--Andrew
Alright. I'm starting to get desparate. You know everybody things you're great, right? I mean, Ashley wouldn't keep attempting to contact just anyone for weeks on end, would she? NO. She most certainly would not.
--Andrew
Oh, and hey!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VZkHodZAF7Y
I think she looks really pretty in this.
--Andrew
I always write better when I'm feeling hopeless. You could give it a shot. I'd certainly be thrilled to peer review anything you penned.
--Andrew
You know, if you look at Liz Phair in her older videos, she kind of looks like Chloe Sevigny does now.
Weird.
--Andrew
Wow. Shit. You're gonna see that you have 13 comments, and get all excited. And then you'll click the link and realize that they're all from me, and it's gonna be such a huge bummer.
Sorry.
I bet you Andrew the Other will comment, soon.
--Andrew
Huh. Listening to Old Liz Phair songs makes me think of visiting you in Boulder.
Those were good times.
I still kind of miss Boulder, as much as it pains me to admit it. But I'm glad you've moved on.
--Andrew
Oh, hey! If you want, I will sit on the sofa and watch La Femme Nikita with you all weekend. Nothing like a television series to get lost in so you can forget your own troubles. I'm really excited to start watching it. You make it sound so engrossing.
--Andrew
Um, goddamn Andrew-the-other. I'm mostly w/o Internet for the next day since I'm at home. Ugh.
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